Exploring Willingness

14th Jan 2010 | Comments Off on Exploring Willingness â€" What Passengers Are On Your Bus? Exploring Willingness â€" What Passengers Are On Your Bus? Imagine that you are now driving a bus in the course of considered one of your values…. Let’s take a value like ‘freedom’. As you drive, passengers climb aboard, representing your experiences, memories, ideas and feelings. Some of the passengers are nice, but others are nasty and disruptive and keep telling you that you simply’re going the incorrect method, you’re a horrible driver, you’re driving too quick etc. In my case, following the value of freedom entails facing up to some fairly nasty demons. For instance, there’s a demon that claims that I am being stupid, no one can ever be joyful at work. There’s another that claims I might be a failure, and that I will never earn enough cash to do the issues I want, and therefore I won't ever actually be free. The temptation is to argue with them â€" I’m not a terrible driver! â€" or to attempt wrestling them off the bus. Trouble is, this stops you from driving. Or you could strive negotiating with them, attempt a different route, and go off on a detour. But what number of instances has this really labored? We have information for you; your mind’s battle with itself is an unwinnable war. But there is an alternate. You can select to just accept the presence of the passengers â€" although you don’t like all of them â€" and be prepared to have them so long as you are making progress towards your values. After all, if you consider it, are your fears really extra important than your values? This is commonly a serious shift in thinking. But consider the occasions when you’ve mentioned that you just’ll just wait to feel motivated and extra confident earlier than you alter your life. Have you ever really been in this good place? Or are the fears you've the same ones they’ve had for years and years, and but still you place your life on hold? How for much longer will you wait? Ultimately the query you should ask your self is who’s in command of your bus? Is it your passengers or is it you? Career Change, Getting Unstuck teaching Tags: ACT in coaching, Dealing with tough thoughts and emotions, Experiential avoidance, Step 1: Understanding stuckness « Slowing down to notice... Should I Consider Wild and Wac... »